Wednesday, January 11, 2012

The Proust Questionnaire (Shamelessly Stolen from Vanity Fair)

by Jason Neal

I'll never be famous or important enough to be asked by Vanity Fair to fill out their iconic Proust questionnaire. But doesen't mean I can't try:



What is your idea of perfect happiness: Sitting on a beach in Aruba with my wife and a bucket of Heineken


What is your greatest fear: Leaving for work one morning and never being able to come back home to my family like the victims in the World Trade Center.

What historical figure do you most identify with: Sir Winston Churchill


What trait do you most deplore in yourself: Timidity


What trait do you most deplore in Others: Arrogance


What is your greatest extravagance: Enjoying a good beer while smoking a cigar


What is your favorite journey: Back roads of Arizona


What do you consider the most overrated virtue: Piousness


Which living person do you most admire: Aung San Suu Kyi, Burmese Democratic Opposition Leader


Which living person do you most despise: Charles & David Koch, CEO's of Koch Industries and any 'Koch'sucker politician who takes their money.


On what occasion do you lie: Spare someones feelings or prevent a bad decision


What do you dislike about your appearance: When you have cleft lip its pretty obvious


Which words or phrases do you most overuse: I'll get to it later


What is your biggest regret: Not keeping in touch with friends from childhood


When and where are you most happiest: Quality time with family where all four of us are in a sublimely happy state which the outside world cannot interrupt.


Which talent would you most like to have: Comedic timing


What is current state of mind: Rushed bordering on edgy


If could change one thing about self what would it be: Normal looking upper lip


If could change about family what would it be: Parents both still alive


If you come back as anything, what would it be: A ghost in the White House


What is most treasured possession: Wedding bands from parents and grandparents


What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery: Being in a work meeting that has nothing to do with you on a busy day knowing its an hour of your life that you will, never, ever get back.


Where would you like to live: St.Ives, Cornwall in England


What is your favorite occupation: Social Worker


What quality you most like in a man: Integrity


What quality you most like in a woman: Humor


What do you most value in friends: Honesty


Who are your favorite authors: Irvine Welsh, Nick Hornby, Ken Kesey


What favorite hero of fiction: Atticus Finch


What favorite hero of real life: Morris Dees, Civil Rights lawyer, founder of the Southern Poverty Law Center and modern day Atticus Finch


What is it that you most dislike: The moneyed, corporate interests that have far too much influence in our political system.


How would you like to die: Peacefully, painlessly on a Cornish beach


What is your motto: 'Onward and Upward, Always'


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