How Much Of An A**hole Are You? A Fun Quiz : )

Since my work computer was being serviced all day by IT decided to make one of those quizzes we could actually use. For the following 12 questions answer Yes or No then add up all Yes responses to determine how much of an a**hole are you:

1. After Japan defeated the US to win the Women's World Cup, did you go on Chat forums and taunt their fans 'Yeah, but we got 2 World Cups and a World War...SCOREBOARD!'

2.Upon hearing Lamar Odom was involved in a car crash resulting in the fatality of a teenager, was your first thought 'Well, police can certainly rule out Lamar being distracted by Khloe Kardashian explaining nuclear physics'?

3.Think back in grade school while you were on a regular school bus and the short bus pulled alongside. There was always that one kid who noticed that A) kids on the short bus looked a little different and B) proceeded to make fun of those kids. Were you that kid?

4.Do a lot of your jokes start out with 'I'm not a racist but...' after looking around cautiously?

5.When Gary Coleman passed away, within 24 hours were you one of those people forwarding dead midget jokes via e-mail? (ie. They say death comes in 3's but Coleman's came in 2.5's)

6. Remember back to a commercial involving Med Alert in the late 80's and a certain iconic scene where an elderly woman on the floor screams 'I'VE FALLEN....AND I CAN'T GET UP!' Did that scene make you laugh? (Add 2 points if in general elderly ladies falling down is humorous to you)

7.Upon seeing Kidnap victim Jaycee Dugard interviewed after her 18 year ordeal, did she register high on your 'Inappropriate Hotness' scale leading you to mention that she's doable while at the Happy Hour with your co-workers?

8.Did you become a New York Yankees fan after 1996 or a Pittsburgh Steelers fan after 2005?

9.When someone shows you baby pictures of kid who's not so cute and her Mom asks if you think she's a pretty baby, did you ever reply 'Not really' (Add 2 points if you replied 'Now I know why Lions eat their young')

10.When walking through a big city and notice a Homeless person panhandling. Have you ever pretended to dig through your pockets to pull out some change only show an empty hand as a gag?

11. At a dinner party, the hostess mentions she's collecting donations for The Special Olympics. Do you attempt to make conversation by mentioning 'I really don't see what's so special about it since anyone can do those events?'

12. Read the following joke from comedian Louis CK then answer as to whether you were able to laugh without the slightest feeling of discomfort or guilt:
'My measure of a person's decency is how long they stopped masturbating after 9/11. For me it as after first tower fell but before the second one did'

Now add up all your Yes answers then check your score:

0 - You are a regular Mother Theresa loved by all living things, especially small children and furry animals

1 through 3: You are Christian Bale, an otherwise decent person but prone to occasional fits of assholishness. Usually your inner sphincter only comes as an angry response to other people like his infamous tirade on the set Terminator or as he would say 'OHHH Good for You!'

4 through 6: You are a Duke University graduate who tends to be a jerk-off by nature but like brilliant sociopaths can be charming when they have to be.

7 through 9: You are Labron James, a adolescent man-child whose assholishness is a unintentional consequence of having every need pandered to by others. He didn't mean to offend Cleveland with 'The Decision' as he was just unaware of other people's feelings. Or completely unaware other people existed period.

10 Or More: You are Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd C. Blankfein and do not feel constrained to the rules and subtleties of human interaction. You don't need to observe the nicety's or civility normally required to gain favor or status in a social setting. Because you're Lloyd (bleepin) Blankfein and therefore don't have to. Exemplified last year at a Congressional Hearing when asked if he wanted to apologize for his company's role in blowing up the economy in 2008, he replied 'No. Not Particularly'. Judaism calls refers to this as Chutzpah or if you are Michele Bachmann it's called Choot-spa.